What is forgiveness? What does it look like? Why is it easy to talk about, but so hard to put into practice?

I am forgiven. I know.
I have forgiven others. I think.
I seek to continue extending forgiveness when anger or dissention reappears. But when I’m honest, it’s all a bit murky. The concept seems too abstract to ever be clear. Perhaps it will forever remain one of those ideas that falls into the 1Corinthians 13:12 category: “For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known” (NASB, 1995).

Many theological scholars contest the clarity of the term forgive within the Hebrew language. These academics claim that in the Hebrew language, there isn’t one seamless concept or explanation. The closest Hebrew term to is “to pardon” which is noticeably not a direct correlation.

According to Studylight.org (2008), forgive means “to send away, to bid going away or depart… to let go, let alone, let be; to disregard… to give up, keep no longer… to permit, allow, not to hinder, to give up a thing to a person; to leave, go way from one…” Though there are many definitions, interestingly, there is one constant connection: forgive, in the Greek language, is always a verb.

I am convinced that forgiveness is not static. It bends and moves; it is highly contextual. For example, there are old boyfriends whom I need to forgive according to this definition: to let go; to not allow to hinder; to give up a person. But that kind of forgiveness is not appropriate for the forgiveness I should extend to my stepmom. To forgive her fits more along the lines of: to keep no longer— reflecting the Corinthian wedding-day passage which describes love as keeping no record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:6).

The various Greek definitions of forgive fall very short of how Christ applied forgiveness to his enemies, this world, and to each of us specifically. At no point has God disregarded or gone away from me as His way of forgiveness. His forgiveness includes a drawing near. He extends grace. He showers kindness, which leads us to repentance.

But can that type of forgiveness be contextual? Appropriate only between God and another because perhaps only the Lord is capable of such pure, discerning, enlightening forgiveness? Implying that the rest of us have too many other emotions harbored against someone to allow free grace to reign. And when we attempt kindness and grace, it pulls us back towards someone we need to move away from. Making my assertion seemingly true: God’s got forgiveness down in a way we’ll never be fully capable of on this side of eternity.

Forgiveness is messy. It’s a muddled thing to forgive and be forgiven. I suppose that forgiveness comes in many forms. Perhaps that conclusion is wrong; perhaps it’s too liberal and whimsical. I am not certain.