I've lived about 1,510 weeks on planet Earth. I just did the math.
And I'll be very honest with you.... this has got to be in the bottom 10 weeks of my lifespan so far.
Sounds pretty dramatic, huh?
That's what heartache will do to a girl. The melancholy takes over and words like "never" and "always" become overused.

This week I've been reflecting on what it means to live from hope versus fear. I fear becoming a person who lives from fear.
Ironic isn't it?
Truth is, I want to seek hope. Always. Hope in all things.

What does it mean to live from fear?
It means staying at a job you hate instead of putting yourself out there.
It means crossing the street when someone of a different skin color walks down the sidewalk.
It means ending a romance because the relationship is going to get hard.
We live from fear when we allow the sheer possibility of adversity to rule our decision-making, our relationships, our lives.

I love verses like 1 Cor 10:13--- Scripture that reminds us: life's full of trials, temptations, and challenges.
As plain as day, we're told that life is hard. We have to deal with alot of crap.
And yet.... we do our best to skip the messy parts of life, don't we? We want control, peace, and an easy path. So we make decisions that protect us from hardship. We prefer a safe road to an uncertain journey or trials of any kind.

The thing is.... life isn't meant to be easy. The goal is not safety.
The goal is the glory of God here among us.
And we see bits and pieces of Him when we live well and love selflessly.
His glory radiates from us when we allow our character to be sharpened in the midst of trials. God is made known here on Earth when we care for others, even when our personal lives are a little shitty as of late.

I just can't believe the great goal of life is safety and comfort.
We are meant for more. Even if that "more" is something messy or difficult.
We are meant for more... our souls deepen when we face hard times.

Thus, I refuse to live in fear. I don't want to spend my life skirting every obstacle.
I want to face challenges with courage, believing that I'll be wiser, stronger, and better on the other side.
I want to live in the HOPE of what life could be.
I must hope that emotional wounds will be healed; I must hope that friendships can be restored; I must hope that cancer can abate; I must hope that who I was yesterday or last year isn't the woman I'll be tomorrow.

I was listening to Mumford & Sons this morning and was struck by a line in their song Sigh No More.
The lyric claims: "Love it will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free. Be more like the man you were made to be."

I want to live from hope and love.
I want to BECOME who I'm meant to be and not fear the hard path ahead. Instead, may we embrace the difficult stuff.... knowing that it shapes us for the better.

May we err on the side of optimism, rebuking fear.
Let us rise up and choose hope in all things.

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