Stress is an odd thing. It's more than an emotion because it doesn't just come and go with your mood. I can be having the time of my life and yet, in that same instant, bear the strain of stress... which is actually a pretty accurate assessment of my moment to moment existence.

As a general rule, I try never to let stress rule over me. I regularly have full cognitive understanding of the many meetings, decisions, papers, and deadlines I have on my plate. Nonetheless, anxiety does not win.

Until, of course, it does. Dr. Seuss explains, "Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.Wherever you go, you will top all the rest. Except when you don' t. Because, sometimes, you won't. I'm sorry to say so, but sadly, it's true..." (Oh the Places You'll Go, 1990)

Recently, it's very true for me.
It seems that no matter what I do, I cannot get out from under this weight. I feel as though I am trapped in a room where the walls are closing in on me. But the walls are invisible and ambiguously labeled: worry.

I am praying.
I am resting.
I am working.
I am playing and enjoying life.
But still this anxiety lingers, and I have no pretty answers or solutions at hand.