I have this single friend, Grace.  You probably know someone like her.  She’s intelligent, hilarious, and a passionate lover of Christ.  She’s also refreshingly honest about walking the fine line between contentment and bitterness when it comes to being single.  One day, she flirted with the waters of bitterness.  It was understandable.  There were too many weddings that summer— too many gift registries, too many bridesmaid dress alterations, and too many wedding pictures popping up in photo albums all over Facebook.  We were discussing the very topic of marriage when quietly Grace remarked, “I feel passed over.”  I waited for some magical sentence to reassure her.  It didn’t come.  If it had, I would tell it to myself every morning in the mirror.  Her vulnerable confession struck a chord with me; I felt the same way.  After I left her, the phrase “I feel passed over” stayed with me.  And yet, as much as I understood Grace, my mind immediately associated her words with another Passover – the one with the blood, Moses, and pharaoh.  In Exodus, when they were “passed over,” they were saved.   God purposed them for His saving hand, for freedom, and for His good blessing— all contingent on their obedience.  Today we are saved by the blood of Christ our Passover lamb; however, I dove further in Exodus to see how these central truths in redemptive history could calm my young, although disdainfully old maid, heart.

The story is found in Exodus 12.  The Lord told Moses exactly how the Israelites were to kill and eat the Passover lamb (Exodus 12:11, NIV).  They were supposed to scarf it down and be ready to hit the road because the Passover wasn’t going to take too long.  My mind cross-referenced to 2 Peter 3:8-9, "…with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day.  The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness…"  According to God's Word and perfect timing, feeling "passed over" isn't going to last too long either – even if that means I’m single until I die at the ripe old age of 84.  Scripture here isn’t directly instructing us to find patience in singleness, yet it sheds some light on my perspective.  I feel like I am being patient with God; but in reality, He is forever patient with me.  He is waiting on me to repent and be conformed to Christ so that I will be ready to experience more of Him.

"This is a day you are to commemorate; for the generations to come you shall celebrate it as a festival to the Lord - a lasting ordinance…Celebrate the Feast of Unleavened Bread, because it was on this very day that I brought your divisions out of Egypt” (Exodus 12:14, 17).  Notice that God explains celebration of the Passover feasts to come and freedom from slavery before it actually happens.  He doesn’t say, “Go slaughter that lamb and rub some blood on the door.  I'll explain later.”  God purposely tells His people that He is faithful to do what He has promised if they are faithful to obey.  In the midst of that relationship, they are to celebrate His faithfulness.  The same is true today: God asks us to depend on His strength to obey His plan and enjoy His presence.  God will bring us out of Egypt, what I might compare to discontent in singleness.  He passes us over right now because He knows bitterness allows "the destroyer to enter your houses and strike you down." (Exodus 12:23).  To indulge in feeling “passed over” is to open up to attack from the enemy.  As he woos us with dissatisfaction, we believe singleness is our doom instead of our rescue by the Faithful One.

In verses 24-27, God tells the Israelites how to teach their children about the meaning of the Passover ceremony.  They are to declare, “It is the Passover sacrifice to the Lord, who passed over the houses of the Israelites in Egypt and spared our homes when he struck down the Egyptians.”  Do you notice how the ceremony is the Passover sacrifice?  Could it be a sacrifice for us to perform the ceremony in our hearts as well?  Do we bring the sacrifice of praise even when we are alone on a Friday night?  Furthermore, how do we desire to portray this time in our lives to our physical or spiritual children?
 
My discontent in singleness isn’t a perfect parallel to the many deaths described in Exodus 12.  But death is a reality for me as a Christian and as a woman who longs for marriage someday. Why? Because, marriage does require dying to self— when two become one.  Yes, we are all called to die to ourselves, but how many of us are really ready to die to self for just another human being... no matter how cute he may be?  Right now my house must be passed over so that I can focus on dying to myself for Christ.

Immediately after the Passover, Pharaoh tells Moses, “Up! Leave my people, you and the Israelites!  Go worship the LORD as you have requested!”  (Exodus 12:21).  The rescue from slavery in Egypt has been completed.  It is time to get up, leave this place of discontentment and walk in the reality of freedom.  I’ve been in slavery to the societal misconception that there is something innately wrong with me if I'm not dating someone.  I’ve been a slave to this desire for a husband over longing for my Savior.  I need to go and worship the LORD and celebrate who He is, rejoice in the amazing rescue He has performed, and focus on eternity in the Promised Land.  My favorite line in the song Table for Two, by Caedmon’s Call, says, “Because I'm so scared of being alone that I forgot what house I live in.”  God just reminded me what house I live in.  It’s the one with Lamb’s blood on the doorpost.  The one that’s been passed over.